New Year's

Late December, 2008

The end of the year brought another opportunity to visit Rebecca, and I prepared for it with great anticipation. I had discussed some important issues with her father, and had determined to pop the big question on Valentine's Day. However, I wanted to buy the ring when I was back home in WA over the break, because I could buy it in Oregon, where there is no sales tax. I planned to take the ring back with me to Florida via Texas, although I knew it would be hard to hold onto it without mentioning it as I was around her all week. But even though a man plans his way, the Lord directs his steps.....

I arrived in Dallas on the evening of December 30. Rebecca and I made our happy greetings and went to our respective lodgings for the night. The next day was New Year's Eve, but a fairly low key day as far as activities went. I had just had ACL reconstruction surgery on my left knee on December 12, so I was still rather fragile and had to take things pretty easy. One important thing that happened was that I received a text message from Christina (Rebecca's older sister) informing me that the entire family would be out of town on Valentine's Day. I could go with them, but I either had to find a way to make a special proposal in small-town Oklahoma, or I would have to do it another time. I was not happy with the prospect of waiting until mid-March, but the idea of doing it on this visit was rather scary too. My mind started churning.

January 1, as well as being New Year's Day, was also Mrs. Craig's birthday. The previous day had been partially spent preparing for the events of this day, including a massive surprise party with several extended family members and many friends arriving at their home at the same time. I spent the day meeting relatives and friends, which was both beneficial and a bit tiring.

One event of the day in particular made me chuckle. A family close to the Craigs had come over earlier that morning, and Mrs. Sessions was watching a video Rebecca had made me. She didn't know I was in the room, and asked Rebecca, "Are you engaged yet?" Rebecca replied in the negative, and Mrs. Sessions snapped her fingers and said something like "Oh, rats!" I snickered and said from behind her, "I'm getting there, don't rush me!" Mrs. Sessions was quite embarrassed, but it was very amusing to both Rebecca and me.

Friday morning, January 2, Mr. Craig and I went out for breakfast. This was the moment I had been nervously anticipating from the day I first began to like girls (instead of thinking they had cooties). Yes...the "May I have your permission to marry your daughter" conversation. 0_0 But first I had to figure out when to pop the question if he gave permission. We conversed a bit about proper timing and he stuck to what he had said before....essentially that it was my decision when to ask her. I brought up the Valentine's Day issue. He agreed that it would be difficult to get around. But the more I discussed it with him, the more I got the feeling that sooner would be better rather than later....especially because she was trying to do some wedding planning already and it was embarrassing to her when people realize that she's not engaged yet. So I began to seriously consider doing it over that weekend.

I was SO nervous. We made small talk for a while until our food arrived and I finally couldn't wait any longer. I said something along the lines of, "Mr. Craig, I will ask you a question I've been dreading to ask ever since I've liked girls.....may I have your permission and blessing to ask your daughter to marry me?" He nodded without hesitating, and I felt a large load lift off my back. I didn't honestly expect him to say no, but it was still nervewracking.

At that point, I was planning to do it the next day, January 3. Mr. Craig and I discussed some potential options as to how to do it, and I eventually settled on a picnic idea. Rebecca had already mentioned that she wanted to have a picnic on this visit, so proposing on such an outing would hopefully be a surprise. I knew Rebecca liked the sound of water, so I asked if there were any good waterfalls or the like in the area. He couldn't think of any, but suggested the Fort Worth Botanical Gardens. In fact, he offered to drive there immediately to scout out possible locations! (Do I have a cool future father-in-law or what? =D) I took him up on it and we drove off.

To this day, the next couple hours stand out in my mind as the most enjoyable time I've shared with Mr. Craig. We spent the whole drive there and back scheming for the next day and talking and laughing about women. The gardens were somewhat pretty, but it was January....meaning there wasn't much green. That is, until we went in the Japanese Botanical Gardens. Most of the vegetation there was elephant grass and bamboo, both of which were still very green. We found a couple beautiful places as potential spots. Mr. C cracked me up when he said that I should pop the question around lunchtime so that the sun wasn't too low in the sky and would glimmer off the ring really nicely. As we left the gardens, I knew that this was the place. Now I just had to pray and figure out if this was the time.

We returned home, where I deflected Rebecca's curiosity about why we were gone so long. I don't remember how the rest of the day was spent...it was overshadowed by the decision I had to make. Late that night, after she left, I lay out on the swing in the backyard and looked at the stars and prayed. It was a beautiful night. I put on my logic hat and had a conversation with myself.

"Why am I perturbed? Is this not the right time, or am I just afraid?"

"If I'm afraid, that's no reason to not do it. God has not given us a spirit of fear. What other reasons am I nervous?"

"Well, it feels rushed."

"What's wrong with that? Is being rushed really a bad thing, or is it just my C-type personality worrying about not having a concreted plan?"

"Hmm. I think that's my personality. The plan that I have is special...it's irrelevant that I just came up with it today."

"Ok, then. If I remove fear and remove my perfectionist tendencies, what do I have left?"

"Just apprehension at the gravity of the committment."

"Yes, and that's appropriate. But not a reason to delay if all other factors say to go."

"Ok.....let's do it."